"I See!", Said the Blind Man

I had an illuminating discovery. Or, an epiphany.

We had an event to attend and I thought I might buy a new dress -- if I could find something I liked and it was on sale. For whatever reason, my Sweetie decided to go with me. Nothing too unusual about that.

After looking and not finding anything, I was ready to leave. Half jokingly, he said, We're leaving already? You didn't get anything. I laughed and said they didn't have anything I liked. He said, I'll find something for you.

In about 2 minutes he was holding up this dress with a pretty print, but it was not anything I'd ever pick for myself. This dress was cut down to there in the front and was almost backless! This was definitely the 'freakum dress' Beyonce is talking about! I laughed and said, Quit playing!

This is where the epiphany comes in. He's not playing! Right there in the store, it dawned on me that my husband sees me as this hot chick! I'm not a hot chick. I'm a 40-something mom. Not that moms aren't attractive; I think I'm attractive. I just don't think I'm a hot chick. But he does. OMG!!

He is insisting we buy this dress. I actually do think the dress is pretty -- nice print, bright colors. I figure, Fine, I'll just return it when he's not around.

We get home and he insists I try it on right now. Right now. Ok, but then I have to finish getting packed for a business trip tomorrow morning.

I get the dress on and get everything situated -- don't act like you don't know what I'm talkin' about! He goes absolutely ga-ga! He says, Now that you have it on, we're going out. The smile freezes on my face. In my head, I'm screaming, I can't wear this dress outside with other people looking at me! But, he's not taking 'no' for an answer. I'm wracking my brain trying to think of ways to disuade him, when I remember I have a pretty wrap that will cover everything nobody else needs to see.

We had a FAN-TAB-U-LOUS time! My Sweetie was so attentive and affectionate all evening. He couldn't take his eyes off me. I was utterly shocked to realize how he sees me. More importantly, I'm shocked to realize what he doesn't see -- the figure flaws I try desperately to hide. My inner voice is saying, Hello, girlie, the man don't see 'em!!

Even the restaurant manager was complimentary -- he sent over drinks, stopped by the table several times to chat, and made unsolicited recommendations. It had to be "the dress".

For me, the takeaway from this was a new self-awareness and the realization not everyone else sees me the way I see me. I think I'll work on seeing myself through his eyes more often. I may even wear "the dress" again.